How do I ask a customer to share examples of the result they want?
Quick answer
Ask for one or two examples that feel close to the result the customer wants, and invite them to explain what they like about each. Clarify that examples help you understand preferences; they do not guarantee an exact match. If they have no examples, offer a few simple prompts—such as mood, audience, or what to avoid—so they can describe the result in their own words.
The question, the details, the next step.
How can I ask without making it sound like I expect the customer to do my work for me?
Make the request optional, keep it small, and explain why it helps. You are asking for clues about their preferences, not a complete plan or a perfect reference.
You could write:
“Do you have one or two examples that feel close to the direction you want? They could be a past piece, a link, an image, or even a rough description. If you share one, please tell me what stands out to you. It’s completely fine if you don’t have an example—we can work from a few words about the feel or effect you’re aiming for.”
The customer can then contribute as much or as little as they can. Avoid asking them to find the “perfect” example; that can make the request feel like another assignment.
What should I ask them to explain about an example?
Ask what specifically appeals to them, rather than treating the whole example as a specification. A useful follow-up is: “What do you like about it—the tone, layout, level of detail, colors, wording, or something else? Is there anything you would change or avoid?”
You do not need to include every prompt. Choose the ones relevant to your work. For instance, if the task is writing, ask whether they mean the friendly tone, short sentences, or clear headings. If it is a visual project, ask whether they mean the color palette, spacing, or overall mood. This helps separate the qualities they want from features that may not suit their own project.
How do I make clear that I may not be able to copy the example exactly?
Say plainly that references guide the direction, while the final result will be adapted to the customer’s needs. Keep the wording positive and avoid promising a replica.
For example: “Thanks for sharing this. I’ll use it to understand the qualities you’re drawn to, rather than assume every detail should be reproduced. I’ll adapt those preferences to the content, audience, and requirements of your project. If there’s one feature you especially want carried through, please point it out.”
That last sentence gives the customer a way to identify a priority. If a particular feature cannot be used, explain that and ask which other quality matters most. Don’t imply that a reference settles choices the customer has not actually made.
What if they have no examples, or send several that seem to point in different directions?
If they have no examples, offer a few easy alternatives: describe the intended audience, the feeling they want the result to create, what it should help someone do, or what they want to avoid. They can answer in fragments; you can turn those into a clearer direction and check your understanding.
If references seem different, don’t guess which one is the model. Ask what each example is meant to show, then have the customer rank the qualities that matter most. One might show the preferred tone while another shows the amount of detail. Confirm your interpretation before proceeding.
A copyable request is:
“Please share up to two examples, if you have them. For each, tell me what you like and what you would change. If you don’t have examples, describe the audience, the feel or effect you want, and anything to avoid. I’ll use this as guidance and adapt it to your project rather than assume an exact copy. If your examples suggest different directions, tell me which qualities matter most.”
A practical checklist
Ask for one or two examples, and make clear they are optional.
Name acceptable formats, such as a past piece, image, link, or short description.
Ask what the customer likes about each example and what they would change or avoid.
Explain that references guide the work but do not promise an exact match.
If examples conflict, ask what each one represents and which qualities take priority.
Repeat your understanding of the preferences before treating them as direction.
A few more useful answers
Should I ask for examples before or after discussing the project?
Either can work. Ask when an example would clarify a preference that is hard to describe, and pair it with enough context about the project for the customer to choose relevant references.
What if the customer sends an example but gives no explanation?
Thank them, then ask one focused question: “What is the main thing you’d like me to take from this?” You can offer a few possible qualities as prompts without assuming which one they mean.
Can I say that I’ll use the example as a template?
Use “reference” or “direction” unless the customer has explicitly asked for a template and that approach suits the work. Those terms avoid implying that every detail will be copied.